MARCH 27 - APRIL 2 2016

MONDAY:
Just arrived home from a weekend away with my best bud Joel and his family. It was a fabulous weekend away and it was much needed. I was in a lot of pain from my accident injuries, however I managed to enjoy the time with loved ones. I was so worried ahead of time that I think I over-prepped food options for myself but at least I had foods I could eat. The only issue as far as my stomach was I got a bit lost and distracted and did not get enough food in, forgetting to eat, drink water, and was feeling a bit sluggish and exhausted from it. I have to remember no matter what situation I am in to make sure I eat. Its such a weird thing to not be hungry. To be distracted by what's going on around you that it just kinda slips your mind. You see others eating, but I thought I will eat in a bit but never did. In the support group I am in, lots of people have eaten jerky, so as we were out I purchased some and not so much. I ate about 3 small bites before t started coming up again.
*THROWING UP: this doesn't happen to everyone, but I am lucky enough to be one of the ones this symptom happens to. I keep trying new foods, only to find they don't work for me. But I will keep trying and re-trying until I can get more in.

I did get to add turkey to my new successful foods. We have a deep fried turkey (not best choice), but it was delish. I did not have the skins, and just a couple ounces so it was okay. So good. I got in lots of walks and just really enjoyed being out in nature. I look forward to doing this several more times this year, and cant wait until I heal a bit to enjoy it more.

WEDNESDAY:
I am quite proud of myself so doing this, for rocking this, and being completely present with myself, my progresses and just putting myself first. Each day I get up and make myself go for that walk, that swim, that bike ride. I plan out my food, and make sure I get my water in. This week is the first week that I feel completely comfortable in getting to my levels needed. I have worked so hard to get to where I am right now, and fought for each pound I have lost and it just feels great when you reflect on that journey and say YES. I did this, I'm doing this, and I will continue to rock at this, because I matter. I am important enough to try harder. Chris is important enough for me to be a better me so I have longer to spend with him.
***I am in love with myself for the first time in a long time, and it feels good.***

Each week I wonder why am I only losing 3-5lbs, why cant I get all my proteins in, how can I possible get that much water in, but it hit me the other day as I was shelling out advise to everyone else who was asking, that I am doing it, I am doing the best I can, and my eye is on the prize. A lot of people read my blog, ask me private questions, and follow me on my journey as they set out on their own, and people ask, how, why, etc etc, and I tell them to do the best you can do and it will all fall in line at some point. Well HELLO, I this week started to listen to my own advise, and realise I was self doubting myself, worrying about my own journey to the point I was becoming afraid to eat, or try new things etc.

BUT I stopped. I know where I 'need' to be as far as what to eat. I am each day finding my way through this complex path or protein and water, what times to eat, when to drink, and how to enjoy some other foods. It takes time.

THIS IS MY WEEK. I finally figured it out, what routine works best for me, How to achieve getting it all in, how to up my calorie counts. Am I perfect heck no, just today, I ate 3oz of food, went running out the door to another appointment with my water, and without thinking while driving started chugging the water. First problem was I just ate and there was no more room for water, second is I chugged it instead of small sipping.Needless to say I wasn't paying attention, and f-d up, and suffered. The pain was horrible, fallowed by throwing up. I had to pull over, and deal with my mistake.

**Anyone having surgery, my advise is to time things, get to a place where you are watching the clock. You know how much to eat (2-4oz) of water or food at a time, so time yourself.
It took "25min" to eat this portion.
I started at 12pm
Ended at 12:30pm
So I can drink water @ 1pm.
It sounds so silly, however this is the best way I have found to not only get in all your food for the day, up your calories, but also your water. Getting it all in is so vital to your weight loss, and I know its hard as before surgery we thought how to reduce food intake, how to eat less but now you need to get those calories up. And for a long time its not possible. I'm now 7 weeks out and just feeling like I am getting an adequate amount of protein and water, so be kind to yourself, and know its a learning curve we all must go through. It will be hard, and you will feel self doubt, and anxiety over not getting it in, BUT its okay, the best part is your on your way, and if you are already focused on trying to get the right foods in (protein/water), then you will succeed.

THURSDAY:
MARCH 31---how did that happen?
I have to share some pretty amazing STATS with you all. In my whole life, like my whole life I have never NEVER, done what I have completed this month. I mean as a kid I played sports, and I ran, and I was in shape, but it was fun for me. I have completed the best work out month of my life this last March, and it feels like such a gift to myself. Just so I can reflect later how well I did, and empower others to do the same......

Here are my March STATS (31 days):
DISTANCE MOVED:              40.3km moved this month
CALORIES BURNED:             22,577 (1/2 of what I consumed)
HOURS WORKED OUT:        45.69hrs of exercise
WORKOUTS COMPLETED:  52<--------say WHAT? That's crazy.
CALORIES CONSUMED:       45,031 (approx. 450 a day)

Tomorrow is MONTHLY weigh in / Measurement day. I am so excited, as I know the scale hasn't moved much, however I know that I must of lost an inch or so for sure. Going to treat myself to some much needed new undies and bras, as mine are falling off.
Not clothes shopping yet, gonna wait and wear these baggy clothes until they literally fall off, or do some thrift store shopping perhaps to get me threw summer. I have gone through my closet of fall and winter clothes and put together 5 garbage bags of stuff that is too BIG. 5 Bags...that's crazy. I put in piles of sell, goodwill, throw away. Its been fun, and at least I have summer dresses that I can wear forever with a belt of some sort. I may look frumpy with my clothes on, however I know how much I rock under them! My body is changing and I couldn't be happier. Cant wait to share #s with you all.

FRIDAY APRIL 1 2016:

Nat's Measurements

October 2015:Weight: 326lbs
Bust: 53.5 inches
Waist: 53 inches
Hips: 60 inches

Arm: 17 inches

Thigh: 31 inches
February 2016 (Surgery Date: Feb 12):Weight: 274lbs
Bust: 52 inches
Waist: 53 inches
Hips: 59 inches

Arm: 17 inches

Thigh: 29 inches

March 1 2016:Weight: 256lbs
Bust: 49 inches
Waist: 49 inches
Hips: 55 inches

Arm: 15 inches

Thigh: 27.5 inches

April 1 2016:Weight: 248.5 lbs     (7.5 lbs down this month / 77.5 lbs in total)
Bust: 48.5 inches       (0.5 inches down)
Waist: 47 inches         (2 inches down)
Hips: 53.5 inches       (1.5 inches down)

Arm: 15 inches            (zero inches down)

Thigh: 25.5 inches     (2 inches down)

So I am pretty comfortable with my weight loss at this point, and now super excited about my inches lost.

SATURDAY:
So this week is coming to an end, and I feel okay. I am in a great place my Doctor said I'm right where I should be and even wrote something in the group after my post in the support group. Here is what I said:
I wanted to share my details, as I know sometimes we struggle, sometimes we worry, and some times we have victories. This process isnt about getting to the finish line first, but learning from a complicated path we have chosen. Your mind plays tricks on you during any stage of this journey, and we have to be so thankful we have each other to talk to, ask questions, seek support and cheer each other on. The way I look at it, no matter what your struggles or triumphs are, we are all winners, as we have found a place where we all feel safe to be ourselves in the moments we are in. SO thank you to all of you for allowing me to be the best me I can be.
April 1 2016:Weight: 248.5 lbs (7.5 lbs down this month / 77.5 lbs in total)
Bust: 48.5 inches (0.5 inches down)
Waist: 47 inches (2 inches down)
Hips: 53.5 inches (1.5 inches down)
Arm: 15 inches (zero inches down)
Thigh: 25.5 inches (2 inches down)
Not gonna lie, I was worried about this weigh in, as I felt my weight slowing down, but knew from feeling my body change I must of lost an inch or two. I am completely comfortable with my progress. I'm not the fastest loser, or see a lot of the changes BUT I am doing great for me. I haven't been below 250lbs for at least 20years. This whole process has been the BEST TIME OF MY LIFE. All the new things I am experiencing have changed my life from existing to living and who cold ask for anything more than that.
Francisco Zavalza, I know we all say and feel the same way about you, and thanking you doesnt seem like enough. I put a picture of you in my fridge so everytime I open it you guide me to better decsions. Sounds silly, but you are always with me, and such a big part of my new life. I appreciate your dedication and love more than you know.
CONFESSIONS:
This month I have eaten
- 6 taco chips
- Easter Bunny Ears
- About 3 oz of Chocolate milk
***Question from you all, how do you deal with guilt?
AMAZING THINGS:
- Hubby said I have stopped SNORING.
- Completed 52 workouts in 31 days
- Not huffing and puffing as I walk.
- Cleaned out 90% of closet as things are way to big
- My dog is losing weight
and and and...life is good.
*Will post Pictures later on my blog after I work out.

And this is what Dr. Z wrote:
Congrats Natalie; almost 80 pounds in 6 months is important. The process is like yours, difficult. We are surrounded of crapy food everywhere; and change that is practically impossible. But you meal by meal, step by step, snack by snack can change your life....!!! Thank you again for allowed me to be your doctor.....!!!!

*I mean, who has surgeons that stay connected with you, stay present in your progress, and encourage you daily. I have never had a medical professional care as much as this man does, who stays engaged in your efforts, gives advice, is openly available for skype, phone calls, facebook messages, and plays an active role in the Support group. Not an assistant on there, or someone he works with BUT HIM. And I feel so supported in all I do, and every confusing step I take, he walks beside me. I am so lucky for this whole experience, not just the health but the friendships I have made, and the constant encouragement I receive from everyone.

*I also have several life time friends who I met down in Mexico, from patients, to doctors, to nurses, hospital staff, hotel staff, all of which stay connected and with me. Melissa, who had her surgery a couple days after me, keeps me in check. We chat most days and help each other along through our stories, our struggles, and victories. She gets it, she knows where I am at. You makes these connections and you just know someone has your back! Its perfect.
I am so okay with where I am, and who I am becoming and try to spend more time thinking about what I have done right and not what has gone wrong. So what if the scale doesn't move for a few days, the inches may move, and I am doing the right things, moving in the right direction and all the positives outweigh any negatives, so I embrace this.
until next week...be strong.

Stay Tuned ~Nat
Mind/Body Under Construction